No Clue

Before we begin discussing "The Hill", I feel obligated to make a quick point. Call it a common understanding if you'd like. Although two men may both be on the same hill in their lives, this does not necessarily mean they are at the same altitude or that they both are enjoying the same view. You see, your hill's elevation, and therefore the quality of the view, is directly related to your happiness first and secondly to your success. A man's happiness and success cannot be objectively measured against another's. Mark Zuckerberg, the 25 year-old founder of Facebook, has a net worth of somewhere around $1.5 billion. On the surface you might think his hill reaches to the heavens while you, the average Joe, has a hill barely higher than one of those crazy African termite mounds. This may very well be true but I give you this to ponder. If Zuckerberg isn't as happy as you are in life then who is enjoying the better view? I think it would be safe to say that an average Joe who is happy in life is atop a hill abundant in sunshine and if that billionaire is miserable then he's constantly in the rain.


Okay then. With that out of they way, let us proceed.


Life as a man is like climbing a mountain. Some of us aspire to climb average sized mountains while others decide to conquer Mt Everest. Each chapter in a man's life is a new hill complete with a base camp full of supplies needed for his survival. You have to use caution as mistakes made, whether because you failed to survey the slope, forgot to pack the right tools or you simply tried to bull your way up, can cost you dearly. Before you know it you're out in the cold wondering what the hell went wrong. The key is to observe other men, learn from their successes as well as their failures and then carefully make your ascent. The next few posts will cover that climb to the mountain top. Once the foundation is laid I will then begin sharing stories about journeys both up and unfortunately down the mountains from my own experience and from close frineds.


I ask that you take a trip back down memory lane to when you were a little tike. Remember back to when some of your biggest worries were what kind of sweets mom would have ready after school or how you could get more baseball cards into the spokes of your bicycle. A little later on maybe you started to shift your thoughts from how can you gross out the redhead girl next door to how can you impress her? Even later perhaps your focus was on scratching up some gas money or trying to get ready for that big chemistry exam. Back then these were monumental challenges that probably even kept you up at night. Little did you know your journey to the mountain top had only just begun. In this post we'll take a look at the early hills covering early childhood all the way up to high school graduation. I like to refer to this time, consisting of 3 hills and base camps, as the "No Clue" phase.

Every man begins his journey as a young boy with very little worries. That first level is always sunny and everything you need in life to survive should have been provided by mom and dad. Sure, you had school and maybe a few chores to keep you busy but most of your time you were probably pretty free to do whatever your little heart desired. Respect your elders, be nice to your siblings, clean your room, wash behind your ears and you were pretty much good to go. As young boys we spent countless hours when not in school riding our bikes, climbing trees and playing games like freeze tag and kick the can. None of us remember worrying about paying the light bill, buying groceries or let alone worrying about the mortgage. We just knew that somehow when the box of swiss cake rolls was empty another one just magically reappeared. Yes, life was good and we all thought it would go on like this forever.

Then you came across that first hill. For most it happens right around the time you entered junior high. At first things don't really seem all that different. You still didn't have to worry about grown up things like bills and jobs and such. You were probably able to ride your bike farther than ever before without mom worrying too much. I can remember riding mine to the local grocery store with my cousin on the handlebars. We'd carry bags to people's cars hoping for a quarter or two. After we hustled up enough we would head to the ice cream stand right across the street. Yes indeed, a boy with some initiative and his Huffy had no limits. You probably began to notice some physical changes in both boys and girls. Honestly, at this age most haven't really changed that much but you may have begun to look at the little redhead in a slightly different way. Yes, thoughts of Hot Wheels and GI Joe were soon replaced by girls and maybe that music album you wanted. Life is still good, but boy does it get better at that next camp.

For most of us, that camp came at 16 when we were actually able to earn some real money with our first job. Hopefully you survived your freshman year of high school in one piece and were no longer fresh meat. If you were really lucky you were able to get your driver's license. Ahh yes, the driver's license. Remember your first solo drive? It didn't matter if your folks were foolish enough to toss you the keys to the new Chevy or if you took off in a 1978 Toyota Celica with 200k miles. During that first adult-less drive you were unequivocally king of the world. A few years at this camp and you were starting to make some big time decisions like if you were going to go to college and if so, where? Maybe you decided to go into the military or had a good job lined up after graduation? Whatever it was, the world was right there in front of you and you had what it takes to take it on!

Of course, all this new freedom came at a price but man was it worth it. The view from the top of this hill was the greatest you had laid eyes upon in your young life. You had a little money in your pocket, a car to pick your buddies up in or better yet to take that doggone redhead out on a date. You were getting bigger and stronger everyday; both physically and intellectually. You probably rode that wave all the way through high school leading up to that big day when you donned that cap and gown and said so long to this hill. You packed up your things and got yourself ready to head up that next hill. You were on your way to "No Responsibility."

Mission Statement

I should probably start with a little background information not already listed in my profile. I have worked for a leading transportation company for nearly 18 years, starting immediately after graduating high school. This means I have spent some of the more formative years of my young adult life in a male dominated industry surrounded by all types of characters. I have strived to absorb all of the good and none of the bad but in the end; I realize that my pursuit of personal excellence may have been tainted by the environment in which I have spent so much of my time.

My mission is “To help all men gain a greater understanding of the challenges and subsequent rewards of manhood.” It may not be the greatest or most well thought out mission statement but I think it hits the nail squarely on its head. Over the years I’ve spent probably too much time discussing things men like to discuss. From the less complicated topics like cars, sports, and money to the more complex and inevitably more heated topics like politics, religion, and philosophy. Never to be forgotten is perhaps the most complex and widely debated topic of all - women. Recently, a few of us blessed with wives and children were engaged in an interesting debate on the topic of women with our single counterparts which led to a revelation. Some might even say an epiphany. Knowing we men retain things more readily when presented in a visual format, I took to the task of penning on my standard-issue white board a visual representation of the debate at hand. Dry-erase marker still in hand, I stood back and before us was something so profoundly beautiful in its simplicity and yet so perfectly complete.


Hence, "The Man Hill" was born.


Over the next few posts I will attempt to recreate “The Man Hill”, or simply “The Hill”, in a literal format. I will also include diagrams where words cannot fully express what needs to be conveyed. From there I hope to lean on my “contributing editors” to help recall some of the revelations leading to the discovery of “The Hill.” I realize there has been a lot of reference to men so far. By no means should this imply women cannot have access to this knowledge. In fact, I encourage you to share this wonderful discovery with the woman in your life but only after you have mastered the concepts of “The Hill.” You wouldn’t hand a loaded pistol to a young child and then ask why something tragic happens? This knowledge in untrained hands would be just as dangerous and the results equally catastrophic.

My goal is to share knowledge, hopefully a few laughs and maybe even some tears. If I can make one man’s life a little easier than I have succeeded. If by chance I can get a woman or two to understand our plight then I’ve exceeded my wildest expectations.